Heal with play !

“The body heals with play, the mind heals with laughter and the spirit heals with joy.”

It wasn’t until it started raining cats and dogs and it went completely dark outside that I realized my son had escaped my attention completely. Suddenly I was aware of the silence inside… No answer when I called him. I looked around in every room, he was nowhere to be found ! Strange, a few minutes ago he was still absorbed in his play…

But then I turned my head and looked outside. There he was in our garden, jumping joyfully up and down on his trampoline completely naked in the pouring rain !

The overprotecting mom in me immediately thought of getting him out of the rain as quickly as possible, but instead of spoiling the fun for him, I decided to observe him for a while.

I have to admit : his energy was contagious ! The whole spectacle made me smile from top to toe aswell.

It made me realize how freely, innocently and joyfully children move through life. It made me realize how often we, adults put an end to this spontaneity.

To what extent are we killers of dreams and are we guilty of destroying the creativity and curiosity of our children ? How many times do we tell them to stop imagining…

How long have you been hiding your own inner child ? How long have you neglected it, avoided it or refused to talk to it ?

What are your excuses for not bringing back some joy in your life ? It’s too late…I’m too old for this…what will the neighbours say ? I’m not supposed to do this, I’m a grown up now…Let’s be serious…

It is programming and conditionning from our childhood that determines so much of how we operate in life and unfortunately we unconsciously project our own restrictions on our children later in life. Because the child within you has been repressed, you will repress your children.

We haven’t healed our own inner child yet and still carry around our own childhood wounds and hurts. All this past pain has consumed our innocence and our ability to look at life with childlike wonder.

Look how easily children connect when they are playing. Look how easily we forget time when we are playing…Playfulness is in our nature ! Joy can nurture us back to life !

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“What did you do as a child that made the hours pass like minutes ? Herein lies the key to your earthly pursuits.”
Carl Jung

Phuro! Be inspired!

 

Multiplying the fish

I guess everyone is familiar with the law of attraction. Maybe you already watched more than one hundred Abraham Hicks movies to get in the right vibration…Perhaps you still wonder why it doesn’t work for you ! You can’t even manifest a tenth of what you truly desire.

My suggestion to you is to observe children, as I found out that they understand the workings of the law quite naturally. I will give you a personal example ! It all happened a few days ago, on my son’s birthday. Let’s rewind…

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Keith : “Mom, Tibo (our neighbour) wants to buy a goldfish for my birthday.”

Me : “Why ?”

Keith : “Because it is a cheap present mom.”

Me :  “Has he forgotten we have 7 cats, they’re not exactely friends with fish…”

Keith just innocently raises his shoulders as an answer…

(LOA explanation : He clearly stated his desire and he didn’t give any meaning to opposing forces….the opposing force that’s me I presume….)

An hour later :

Keith : “Mom can I go to the garden center with the boys ?”

Me : Yes, son no problem.

Keith : “Thanks mom ! Oh by the way mom, WHAT IF Tibo really buys that goldfish ?”

Me : (Sigh..) “I guess we’ll just have to prepare it a nice spot, isn’t it ?”

Honestly I didn’t want the same scenario as 8 years ago when our Indian neighbours bought him a guinae pig for his birthday. Back then we thought they were joking ! We had to rush to the petstore to buy a cage, some toys and food !

Speedy still has a happy life with us, his closest experience with winter is spending the night inside with a heater next to his cage. In human terms that’s like celebrating Christmas on Bondi beach !

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So this time I was going to be prepared ! While they went away I quickly decided to get the old tank out of the basement. I immediately cleaned it and put fresh water in it. Just in case…

On arrival my son came in empty handed !

Me : “Well where’s your fish ?

Keith :”He didn’t buy it…, maybe tomorrow…

Me : “But I already installed the fish tank !”

Keith : “Are you serious mom ?”

(LOA explanation : Allthough he was prepared to receive, he didn’t put any expectation on it. It came or it didn’t…Guess who was the silly one ? Yep, mom !)

On the second day the fish tank was still empty, friends who came to visit us immediately spotted the tank in our living room and went looking…

“Hey how nice, you got a fish ! Wait a minute…Where is it ? I can’t see it… ?”

Me : “That’s because it’s an invisible one….”

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(LOA explanation : On day two my son already had help from me in sustaining his vision and in denying his current reality. We didn’t conform to outside appearances…)

On day three the three musketeers (my son and the two neighbour boys) arrived with a large bag filled with water ! On closer look I saw that the fish already had multiplied, there were three of them instead of the promised one !

(LOA explanation : He must have been very confident about his fine tuning as he even got more than he wanted !)

In meantime Silver, Black Eye and Jack are doing great…Oh and the cats….They enjoy their new television, it’s always on the food channel !

May the force or law be with you…always !

Phuro! Be inspired!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shatter the silence

A few years ago a woman told me her distressing story. It all happened when she was very young. She said that she took the boat to England with her father and her uncle. But it wasn’t just an overseas trip full of fun and pleasure; for the little girl it turned into a nightmare as she was raped by both her uncle and her father on board of that ship.

She was told that if she would cry or tell anyone “something” would happen to her or that she would simply be thrown overboard…

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She had suppressed these horrific facts, she couldn’t even remember that the events took place…Until she experienced mental and physical problems in her twenties and she decided to go into regression therapy. There it all became clear what happened and what was really the cause of her problems.

A colleague of mine told me how she went to school one day when she was 12 and was molested by a group of youngster from her school. She made it to school, completely in tears and barely dressed…the woman is now in her fifties and could tell the story as if it happened yesterday…

A friend of mine told me how she fell of her bike one day while she was in the park with her mother…An older boy managed to get her out of view of her mother, told her he had some candies to comfort her so she followed him…well I don’t have to tell the result eighter…

And yes sadly enough me too, you can read my personal experience here !

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I wish all these stories were just fictional ones, but sadly enough they aren’t and they still happen in real life all around the world…rape and murder of innocent children !

Luckily the metoo campaign worldwide brought some change or at least some attention to this deeply rooted problem of sexually harassing people, whether they are male or female !

But then there were these people complaining about all these things that the metoo campaign had taken away from them : no flower girls anymore at the end of a cycling competition, no babes surrounding the F1 cars anymore !

If you would have treated women respectfully and just celebrated their beauty as it should there wouldn’t be a problem. But you reaped what you sowed and now you have to face the consequences of regarding women as meat, exploiting their bodies just to satisfy your darkest desires…

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Have you ever considered the consequences molestation has on people, especially children ? They face a life time struggle…

What those people lost due to abuse : they lost their trust in people, their belief in the good of men, they often lost their zest for life and are traumatized for life !

The next victim of abuse could be your daughter or your son, your sister or your brother…Just ask anyone you meet if they have been victim of abuse, you will be surprised of their answers….

Think about that the next time you are enjoying your porn !

Phuro! Be inspired!

 

 

Peek-a-boo !

“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”

Children are amazed

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Children cut off seriousness 

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Children connect with others

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Children embrace each moment 

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Children play

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Children are teachers of love

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Children fully ACCEPT who they are !

Phuro! Be inspired!

 

 

 

Cut it out bullies…

I don’t have to tell anyone the difference between a bully and a victim or an agressor and a defender. But what do bullies and their victims have in common?

They are both “unbalanced” and swing between anger and fear !

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Some kids grow up in harsh environments, without any signs of affection or words of support and appreciation. Some have to confront a bully at home, some are victim of verbal or physical abuse.

These children often become fearful, resentful or agressive. Some become bullies themselves as a way to cope with their life and deal with the pain. “Someone has to pay !”

Some are in search of someone they can control, who are an easy target for their verbal assaults or physical attacks, children who show signs of weakness, looking “weird” or react fearful.

The victim’s life will get worse if the bully isn’t stopped. The victim’s fear becomes frustration, the frustration becomes anger and is eventually spitted out on parents, sisters, brothers,…It causes a serious vicious cycle, everything is loaded !

Mental strength and emotional resilience

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Each time the bully shoots his arrows on you and you feel bad, he has found ground where his anger can settle and sprout ! Then you make it even worse with repetitive negative thoughts about yourself.

Knitted together they make a giant ball of frustration, difficult to untangle ! Ever had a chewing gum in your hair ? That kind of nasty thing ! You’ll have to come up with an ingenious solution if you do not want it to turn into a complete mess !

Self analysis * change * transformation

Freeze it on spot !

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You are not freaking out this time ! Be an iceman : let them fire their fiery flames ! You will build a huge icewall to protect yourself. The flames will have vanished before they can hit you ! That cold icy layer and that cold freezing air around you makes you untouchable for these attacks. “Is that all they got ?” Brush yourself off !!

Tip : There’s a breathing and relaxing method called the Freeze frame technique developed by Heart Math institute that can help you stay calm in case of emergency.

Energy level

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What is your current energy level ? How is your health ? Are you eating the right food ? Do you have any physical pain, where does it hurt ?  What is your overall body feeling

When emotions accumulate they cause stress and dis-ease in your body, they will make your body go weak.

Tips : Eat plenty of natural and fresh food. Don’t self-medicate !

Thoughts & beliefs

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Write down your repetitive thoughts about the situation, about yourself, about the bully. What kind of thoughts are you constantly chewing on ? Your thoughts will eighter be occupied by something in the past or something in the future !

Where’s your self-talk heading ? How do you describe yourself ? What are words or sentences you frequently use ?

Tips : Make your self-talk positive. Learn to visualize a good outcome. Focus on the positive. Be courageous ! Have a role play with friends or family to practise some good one-liners !

Emotions & feelings

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Your habitual thoughts will cause you to imagine different kind of scenarios. A doom scenario in your head will usually result in a bad feeling. How often do you repeat previous attacks in your mind, each time experiencing the emotions again ? You can already feel fearful because of what tomorrow brings. Before you know you are in a vicious cycle with continious vicious results.

Tips : Focus your attention on things that feel good, let go of bad feelings instead of storing them in your body. Learn how to relax and do breathing exercices. Focus on heart feelings ! Anger issues : find some tips here : Throwing a tantrum ?

Triggers

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Is there something out of your control ? Something or someone in your surroundings that actually worsens the whole thing ?

Do you have supportive family or friends ? When yes, spit all your worries out !

Tips : Too sad, too lonely, too depressed ? Seek help ! Suicidal, someone threatens you ? Seek help !

Social behavior

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What is your attitude and style around other people ? How’s your walk and talk ? Are you walking with your shoulders up or down ? Are you facing the ground or looking around ? Do you want to control people all the time or are you the one being controlled ? Are you shy or bossy ?  What kind of behavior of others triggers you ?

Tips : Practise your attitude in front of a mirror, look confident, stand straight ! Make eye contact when you talk to someone ! Tell your affirmations out loud in front of the mirror every day !

“When did a dragon ever die of the poison of a snake ?”

Nietzsche

All these things are related, and you will find out that when you bring a positive change in one section another will soon follow. Use the tips and you will surely get positive results !

Your own thoughts and emotions can be your biggest monsters and the most challenging  but you are always in control of them and you are able to change them ! When you face the fears inside the bully often disappears outside !

Phuro! Be inspired!

Don’t take life too seriously !

“Seriousness is a state of disease; humor is health. Love, laughter, life, they are aspects of the same energy.”

Osho

Playfulness is one of the most repressed parts of human beings. All societies, cultures, civilizations have been against playfulness because the playful person is never serious.
And unless a person is serious, he cannot be dominated, he cannot be made ambitious, he cannot be made to desire power, money, prestige.

The child never dies in anyone. It is not that the child dies when you grow, the child remains. Everything that you have been is still within you, and will remain within you until your very last breath.

But society is always afraid of nonserious people. Nonserious people will not be ambitious for money or political power; they would rather enjoy existence. But enjoying existence cannot bring you prestige, cannot make you powerfull, cannot fulfill your ego; and the whole world of man revolves around the idea of the ego.

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Playfulness is against your ego – you can try it and see. Just play with children and you will find your ego disappearing, you will find that you have become a child again. It is not only true about you, it is true about everyone.

Because the child within you has been repressed, you will repress your children. Nobody allows their children to dance and to sing and to shout and to jump. For trivial reasons ,perhaps something may get broken, perhaps they may get their clothes wet in the rain if they ran out – for these small things a great spiritual quality, playfulness is completely destroyed.

You have to drop all seriousness. You have to drop this seriousness because it has been forced upon you; this is not your nature. You did not come serious into the world, you came laughing. Each child is bubbling with joy and by the time he is four he starts dying. The age of four for the boys and the age of three for the girls is the time when death starts occurring.

My approach towards life is that of laughter. And laughter contains love, laughter contains joy and laughter contains gratitude. Laughter contains a tremendous thankfulness towards God. When you are really in deep belly laughter, your ego disappears. It happens very rarely in any other activity, but in laughter it is bound to happen.

No child is born serious, remember, but we destroy the innocence of the child. We destroy his qualities of wonder and awe, we destroy his laughter, we destroy everything that is beautiful and valuable, and instead we give him a load to carry on his head — of knowledge, of theology, of philosophy.

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The more and more he becomes educated by us, the more and more he loses all sense of humor. He can’t see any humor in existence because he starts living through his knowledge; he knows everything. Because of his knowledgeability all wonder is destroyed.

Because of his knowledgeability, the greatest religious quality — awe — is killed

Take hold of your own life. See that the whole existence is celebrating. These trees are not serious, these birds are not serious. The rivers and the oceans are wild, and everywhere there is fun, everywhere there is joy and delight. Watch existence, listen to the existence and become part of it. Then you become a Baul, then you become a lover — because love can exist only with a deep respect for fun, with a deep respect for delight.

Love cannot exist with a serious mind. With a serious mind, logic is in tune. be non-serious. I’m not saying not to be sincere. Be sincere, but be non-serious. Sincerity is something else; seriousness is totally different. Be sincere with existence, then you will be true; you will become part of this cosmic LEELA, this cosmic play.

Osho (Life, Love, Laughter)

Phuro! Be inspired!